~Let The Birdy Sing~

[kodawari]

The mare walked slowly, her steps unsure. Her gaze kept traveling north, where one could just make out Heaven. She had been walking in this endless field for almost an hour. Mid-day, the sun was hot, beating down on her extremely rare coat.
Ah, but what exactly does she look like?
Lady Bird, as is her name, is a Gypsy Vanner. And has most of us know, Gypsy's tend to only be black pinto and bay pinto. Maybe a sorrel or chestnut. But she is neither of these. Buckskin tobiano with a glorious cream mane and tail. Of course, Bird does not know just how amazing she is, in coloring or beauty or even her personality. She grew up believing she was worthless to everyone around her and to herself. Her father had verbally abused her so much, that it almost came to suicide for this mare. Her mother saved her eventually. running away together, her mother tried to convince her that she was special, but Bird never really listened, her fathers voice in her head seeming louder than her mothers who stood right beside her.
Now her mother is dead and she has been walking aimlessly for too long. Any horses she sees, she avoids. Bird thinks her life is over and should be ended. The only reason she is walking on this earth right now is because she is trying to figure out a way to end her life.
A little emo, yes? But she still wants to live. There is still a spark of life in her, being only seen in her eyes as she walks.
She glanced toward the north again, only for a few seconds. Then she let her gaze shift all the way around her. There were a few horses here and there, but she ignored them, even when a young mare nickered at her in greeting. She held her golden and white head low, her steps almost seeming to drag along the ground. No one would love her, and she knew it. But for some reason she wanted to try, try and find... someone. But that though was at the very back of her mind, and it stayed there. Lady bird stopped, exhausted. She breathed slightly heavily, her head lowering even more. But she stayed alert, wary. She always did. Especially when horses were around her. Trust was not on the top of her list. Her ears swiveled around her head as she attempted to relax, but couldn't...

[♥Autumn♥]

The large stag sniffed at the grass below his daggars, pink innards flaring. His muscular bodice rippling like the ocean as he kept his massive self going. His coffee colored pools were empty, there was nothing there anymore. His flame was just gone.

As he moved on, finding interest in nothing he stood, sulking. Everything was gone, his heart, his soul, his mate, his whole life. At least that is what he felt. He going to be a father, until his mate's life was tragically ended and it was his fault. If only he had been there, or gotten there faster. His pools begin to cloud as tears began to race down his face.

He stumbled as he began to move once more, and as he hit the ground, the earth shook beneath him. Sighing he picked himself back up and continued. Everything around him reminded him of her. The flowers that grow upon this land smelled of her. The soft breeze that kissed his hide and banners felt of her presence. What was he to do now?

He shifted his gaze, and it softly fell upon another. Mare possibly? Shaking his head, he had no interest in anything, may as well have a nice conversation before he let himself go. He wanted his life to end, he wishes he was the one who had fallen through the ice. Her name ran through his mind as he approached. Adela.....Adela I love you. I need you guidance, your presence. I need you. He closed his eyes, picturing her as he paused many feet away and blew through his nares. "H-...." he sighs, giving up on speaking, but tries once more. "Hello....I.." He holds back tears. "I am Achilles"

[kodawari]

The mares body tensed once more as she realized a horse was headed straight for her. But as he came closer, she decided he wouldn't be too much of a threat. He looked worse than her. A pang of sadness hit her, but she pushed it away. he was built much like her, but there was a huge difference in scale. He was a lot taller, so therefore wider, too. He didn't come too close, but she felt tiny, and the feeling brought back horrible memories that she forced to the back of her mind. He was a good three ands taller.
Her Multi-colored ears swiveled forward as he tried to speak. The way he spoke sent another pang through Lady Birds heart. Even though she didn't want to, she felt bad for this stallion. The life seemed to have been sucked out of him.
She lowered her head in a slight bow, her white and black forelock covering her eyes. She shifted on her tan hooves, not sure exactly what to say. She avoided looking into his eyes. She was just bewildered that he was speaking to her.
"Hello, Achilles..." She paused for a moment, taking her gaze off the ground to look at him only for a second. "I am Lady Bird. But I am called just Bird." Her voice held a sadness in it. Not nearly as devastating as Achilles', and that got her wondering what happened to him. It was obviously recently. She almost asked him, but she squelched the urge, knowing it would have been extremely rude. Why should she even care anyways. Bird didn't know why she cared when she was trying so hard not to...

[♥Autumn♥]

Achilles lifted his head slightly as she spoke. Not a feeling stirred inside him, then suddenly his auds pricked as she sounded much like he, empty. He blew slightly through his nares when she finished. Her voice too reeked of sadness and emptiness. He inhaled and began his reply.
My coffee pools, turn to grey
Realizing that fate brought you to me
Only to take you away.

No Longer do i feel the warmth of your body
Next to mine.
Nor do i feel your presence
As I lay awake at night.

A father i was to be
Now you are both gone
And have left me crying, broken, and empty.

He finished, tears slipping away. They hit the ground beneath his mass. He watched them fall for a few short moments, not knowing what else to say or do. What was he doing? He was once such a fine and proud stallion, but now he slowly crumbles. He wasn't sure if he felt embarrassed to be crying in front of this mare, for he was sure she would understand,

[kodawari]

As he spoke the depressing words, it suddenly made her understand why he was in such horrible shape. When he was done, she realized a tear had slipped and was falling down her face, and she had taken a step forward, ready to take another. She stopped herself from doing so. Her muscles quivered slightly. He lost what was probably the love of his life... And an unborn child? Was that what it was? She was fairly certain.
As her muscles, her voice quivered as she spoke. "I... I am s-... So sorry, Achilles."
Then she couldn't stop herself. She walked the few steps it took to get to him and lightly touched his shoulder. Her voice was barely a whisper when she spoke again. "My, uh... My mother... She..." But she couldn't say anymore. Her throat clogged, choking the words off. She took her muzzle off his shoulder and looked away, her eyes closed, another tear slipping down her face. Her tears were for herself, but also for this stranger.

[♥Autumn♥]

Achilles, stumbled a bit but kept his footing. How could a giant as he, crumble easily, but he knew why. They, yes they, were part of his life, whether or not he had ever met his child, and for no reason were taken away. He not only lost one part of his life, part of his past, present and future....but he had also lost more of his future when they broke the ice. He remembers watching so clearly, still fresh in his mind. He remembers her last breath before she finally sunk out of sight. His heart was beating in his auds when he snapped into reality. He felt her, touching him. Adela? Then he was quick to see her, Bird. Bird, was her name, so simple yet beautiful at the same time. Her leaned into her touch and auds pricked when she stopped halfway through her sentence. He nudged her on.

[kodawari]

She herd him speak. A name? Yes, it was a name. Her name, the one he lost. As she glanced at him, he realized it wasn't Adela, she could tell. Her ears were flopped to the side, not even wanting to use the bit of energy it took to hold them forward. But when he nudged her, they flicked forward, weather she wanted the to or not. She turned her head away again, a silent sigh escaping her. "She uh..." This was the first time she would ever tell someone. "She was murdered." And then the part that she hardly even let her mind tell her, remember. "By my father." She gasped as she realized she had said it allowed, her whole body shuddered once.

[♥Autumn♥]

Achilles was breathless as she spoke so much like her, his mind wandered, when suddenly he was missing out on what she had to say. He turned his crown her direction, greying, chocolate eyes fell upon her with pity. Not actually pity, but sorrow for her pain. Hi shuddered at her words of what wrong had been done to her. How sad that a mares mother die so early in her time. How sad it is to feel loss within your early years. so much pain it brings upon a young soul. He sighed and cleared his throat.

"Im sorry..m-..fair maiden, for the pain and suffering that has been brought upon you, so unfairly by the gods." He looked towards the heavens. "I have not spoken of her in so long, and i can tell you haven't told a soul neither?"

[kodawari]

Lady bird lifted her head to look at him as he spoke. It felt almost... Better, now that someone else knew. But that would never take the sting away, no matter how many she told. Her eyes were filled with sorrow, but this time not only for herself. She found herself nodding at his question, her gaze back on the ground. "You are the first."
She shook her golden head slightly in confusion. "And I... I don't know..." She looked at the giant stallion once more. "Why..." Another tear threatened to roll down her face, but she stopped it before it did. "You have suffered much as I have... maybe that is why...? The last sentence was phrased as a sentence, but there was a definite twang of questioning in it, searching, hoping for an answer.

[♥Autumn♥]

Achilles held his breath, his pain, and his fury for his mates death. He let himself become consumed by this for so long. He shuddered as he tried so hard to hold back the tears, he leaned into her more and brought his head over hers as he tried to comfort her as well. His auds flickered with her words. Her last sentence, was it a question or statement?Both? He sighed and looked at her as his eyes began to gain color once again.

"I know not why, i know not why it was so easy for me to break down in front of thee. Perhaps i was being lead to this place, this very moment. Maybe now is the time for us to let go, but never forget. Maybe it is time for us to be happy?"

He shrugged as he spoke then finished and he lifted his head to catch her gaze.

[kodawari]

She started to pull back when he put his head over hers, but it was such a comforting feeling, she stopped. Her gaze had shifted back to the ground until he said the word happy. Her black eyes locked with his, now seeming to have more color in them, more life. Her own had stopped swimming with threatening tears. A breeze blew her forlock to the side, her mane sifting along her neck, but she hardly took notice. "Maybe..." It was barely a whisper, but that was all it would need to be for him to hear her, since they were so close. She gently nudged his shoulder again, saying, "I think you might be right..."

[♥Autumn♥]

The massive stud looked at her with more curiosity. His eyes weakly gave away the pain he still felt, the pain may never go away, but he could learn to look past it, to look towards the future. Maybe someday once again he will have the chance to become a father once again. Everything revolved around a maybe for him now, not sure if he should put that he absolutely knows that it will happen, for he knows where this has brought him. Her terrorized look still haunted him, the look she had in her eyes as she fought to keep her head above water.

Shaking his head, his eyes glazing over. He winced as he swore he could hear her voice. You need to let go Achilles...I love you, but you need to let me go.
No..I can't, stay with me..please Adela.
I will always be with you my dear Achilles, but my life has ended and yours is still in motion. Look inside yourself. Do you really want to spend the rest of your life, mourning my death when you could be making a life worth living, with a family by your side? I want you to know that i want you to let me go, do not fear of me never forgiving you. Im here. I love you,forever an always.
I love you too...His pools shot open as he realized he had spoken his last words aloud, but in a hushed voice.[/color]

"I am not sure, as I have been unsure of my judgments, since she.....passed" He stumbled with his sentence, speaking of her death. "But i have full confidence in the decision I am to make soon. I am letting go of you, my dear Adela...It is for the best" As he spoke a soft wind brushed against his hide, kissing every inch of him and eventually combing through his banners. A slight smile came upon his maw, for he knew it was her.

[kodawari]

Lady bird kept quiet through the whole thing. He was letting go. She just knew, and his words ended up proving it.
She lowered her head. She needed to let go. But what she would have to do would be much different, and she wasn't quite ready yet. Of course, her moms death was devastating. This conversation had brought up old wounds. But she had accepted her mothers death to a point. Her problem was fury now. These last few moments it had been buried in the sadness. Still was, but Bird knew it would come back.
Her whole life, she had never been mad at her father. No matter what he did. It was antral to her. But the death of her mother pushed her over that fine line between love and hate.
But for now... what?
"I..." She shifted back slightly, away from the giant stag. "I um.. I have..." But she couldn't really think straight. "I have to..." What? Go get lost, possibly starve? She didn't know. She had been drawn to this stallion, by their grief they shared, she was sure. But she was still wary. She gave him an almost pained look, her eyes confused. She began to turn away from him, not sure exactly where she was going to go in this endless field.

[♥Autumn♥]

Achilles stood there unmoving, like he had no feeling whatsoever. His massive body started to tingle at uncertainty once again, but he would not give in. He had made his choice and he was sure it was the right one at that. His soft gaze landed upon the femora as she spoke unsurely, as if she were picky of words and not sure which to use.

He bent his nape and his nares brushed across her withers, nuzzling her. He wanted her to know she could say anything to him.

You have to what? If i am keeping you from completing any plans of yours, i wouldn't mind leaving?

[kodawari]

Bird hesitated and shivered slightly on his touch. At his words, she almost gasped. The idea of being alone, again, suddenly seemed horrible. She had been wandering aimlessly and alone for too long. And having this stallion with her actually made her feel at ease. She felt comfortable around him, which was something that happened rarely. Maybe all that being alone finally took changed her. Or maybe it was just that she actually took time to talk. Even if it was about depressing things.
Plus, this had finally got her mind of her father, which she no doubt would have gotten extremely angry if she continued to think about him.
"Just... Actually nothing. What am I going to do? I don't need to do anything. My life is frozen in time. Besides, I don't even know where I am."
She sighed slightly, unsure what else to say. But now, she no longer wanted to leave.